{"id":711,"date":"2022-02-06T13:53:18","date_gmt":"2022-02-06T13:53:18","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/findelostiempos.net\/?page_id=711"},"modified":"2022-02-06T13:59:56","modified_gmt":"2022-02-06T13:59:56","slug":"zine1maria","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"https:\/\/findelostiempos.net\/es\/zine1maria\/","title":{"rendered":"Zine1Maria"},"content":{"rendered":"
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Zine<\/h2>\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t
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Volume 1: Mar\u00eda<\/h2>\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t
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Published in February 2019, in Barcelona. Scroll down for a full transcription in Spanish and English.<\/span><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t

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\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/i>\t\t\t\t\t\tPrevio<\/span>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t
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\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/i><\/span>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/i><\/span>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/span>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\tEspa\u00f1ol<\/a>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t

Entras al cine, checas la cartelera y te formas para comprar un boleto. Adelante de ti, dos parejas esperan en silencio. Llegaste en el momento adecuado; la fila se hace m\u00e1s larga, y ahora resulta que est\u00e1s casi hasta en frente. En el mostrador, pides uno para la pel\u00edcula que escogiste, pagas, y te vas a la dulcer\u00eda, donde compras unas palomitas y un refresco medianos.<\/span><\/p>

Entras a la sala y caminas a los asientos del medio. Te quedas pegado al pasillo. Mientras esperas a que empiece la funci\u00f3n, te comes la mitad de las palomitas e intentas no tomarte todo el refresco. Volteas a ver qui\u00e9n m\u00e1s est\u00e1, y encuentras a las dos parejas que estaban adelante de ti en la fila. Unos, un par de filas en frente de ti, y los otros hasta atr\u00e1s, en la esquina derecha. No reconoces a nadie m\u00e1s. Las luces se hacen m\u00e1s tenues, y el sonido del primer anuncio te llama la atenci\u00f3n hacia la pantalla.<\/span><\/p>

La pel\u00edcula empieza. Salen los cr\u00e9ditos, el t\u00edtulo, y ahora la cara del que asumes es el protagonista. Te reacomodas en la butaca, cruzas una pierna o la otra. Te tomas el \u00faltimo sorbo del refresco. Los personajes hablan, caminan por la casa, comen. Suena el timbre, y uno se acerca a abrir la puerta.<\/span><\/p>

Entran primero un hombre y luego una mujer. Y, en cuanto ella aparece en pantalla, se voltea hacia ti y avanza, cada vez m\u00e1s cerca, hasta parar a un par de metros de ti, en el aire. Sus ojos caf\u00e9s te recorren enterito, su boca se aprieta un segundo. Te habla. Con una voz eterna, melodiosa, te dice cosas que al principio son incomprensibles, que poco a poco van cobrando sentido para tus o\u00eddos y tu mente. Como si le respondiera, un peque\u00f1o escalofr\u00edo recorre la longitud de tu espina. Ella cierra los ojos y respira. Te dice secretos que no sab\u00edas y detalles que se te escaparon, te recuerda cosas que hab\u00edas olvidado.<\/span><\/p>

T\u00fa, paralizado, eres incapaz de emitir palabra. Intentas abrir la boca para hablar, pero no la encuentras por ning\u00fan lado. Ella te observa, sus ojos se entornan en la menor de las sonrisas. Buscas en tu mente respuestas a las preguntas m\u00e1s simples que te hace, pero no hay nada. Te llama, y tu cuerpo entero se estremece intentando responder. Pero no te mueves, tu mente no procesa, tus pulmones no hallan aliento. Ella guarda silencio, te espera serena, pero en su presencia incluso el esfuerzo por responder se te va perdiendo en la mente. Ella contin\u00faa hablando. T\u00fa la miras at\u00f3nito.<\/span><\/p>

Te cuenta historias, tu cuerpo vibrando con la energ\u00eda que su voz te transmite. Se te pone la piel de gallina y las orejas calientes. Ella te mira tiernamente, y mientras lo hace t\u00fa comienzas a encontrar peque\u00f1os rastros de ideas y memorias en tu cabeza. Poco a poco, se te llena la mente de recuerdos perdidos, de momentos fugaces que te convencen que la conoces. Son \u00edntimos de siempre, te acompa\u00f1a en los d\u00edas, te vela en las noches. Te acuerdas de su presencia, la ves a trav\u00e9s de tus p\u00e1rpados medio cerrados, justo antes de quedarte dormido. La sientes, en los pocos sue\u00f1os de los que tienes memoria.<\/span><\/p>

Te sonr\u00ede. Te muestra cosas que te entristecen, que te alegran, que te sorprenden. Te canta canciones que conoc\u00edas bien, pero ahora las escuchas y las sientes nuevas, vivas. Te canta otras que nunca hab\u00edas escuchado, sonidos y palabras que hasta este momento se escapaban de las capacidades de tu imaginaci\u00f3n. Te recita poema tras poema, cada uno m\u00e1s melodioso, m\u00e1s profundo, que el anterior. <\/span><\/p>

Y, conforme llena tus o\u00eddos y tu cabeza, te percatas de un calor que sabes haber sentido, que ten\u00edas escondido en alg\u00fan lado. Te sale de lo m\u00e1s profundo y se extiende, primero por tu pecho y hacia tu cuello, a lo largo de tus brazos y piernas hasta llegar a las puntas de tus dedos. Te envuelve. Y mientras lo hace, ella te sigue mirando, comprehensiva del momento que est\u00e1s viviendo, de la fuerza de la luz que ahora vas encontrando es la fuente de este calor que sientes.<\/span><\/p>

Pero t\u00fa sigues en la butaca inm\u00f3vil, sin haber encontrado nunca esa boca que perdiste. La ves con toda la admiraci\u00f3n que puedes conjurar en tus ojos. La recorres con la mirada, intentando guardar cada detalle de su cara, de sus manos, de su boca y de sus ojos en tu memoria. Y as\u00ed, en tu cabeza, catalogas y resguardas cada rastro de esta interacci\u00f3n, asign\u00e1ndoles un lugar privilegiado en el centro de tu conciencia. En silencio, le juras devoci\u00f3n eterna, y, aunque ella ni te lo pide ni crees que lo desea, obediencia total. La amas.<\/span><\/p>

De repente, un grito te llama la atenci\u00f3n a la pantalla. Alguien ha muerto y una mujer llora a su lado. No sabes qui\u00e9n es ninguno de los dos personajes, ni qu\u00e9 est\u00e1 pasando. Otro personaje r\u00ede, pero tampoco lo reconoces, y mientras buscas en tu mente alguna idea de qu\u00e9 est\u00e1 sucediendo en esta pel\u00edcula, encuentras por aqu\u00ed y por all\u00e1 rastros de algo importante.<\/span><\/p>

Te aferras a ellos, sinti\u00e9ndolos indispensables, y buscas m\u00e1s y m\u00e1s adentro de tu cabeza este momento que se te escapa, que estuvo aqu\u00ed hace un instante y que r\u00e1pidamente se desvanece hacia el olvido. De una voz y un secreto que tampoco recuerdas, intentas reconstruir esto que sabes que acaba de pasar, que hace un momento fue todo y que ahora ves desvanecerse.<\/span><\/p>

Pero el asiento pica, tu garganta te pide m\u00e1s refresco. Y mientras levantas el vaso para comprobar que efectivamente ya te lo terminaste y te toca pasar sed, lo poco que quedaba de este momento se esfuma, y ahora ya no sabes qu\u00e9 es lo que buscas tan desesperadamente en tu memoria. Ahora en vez escuchas el vibrar del celular de la persona de al lado, y c\u00f3mo la butaca de la de en frente rechina cada vez que se echa para atr\u00e1s. Te molesta darte cuenta que el piso bajo tus zapatos est\u00e1 pegajoso, y que el aire que antes ol\u00eda tan normal ahora carga un matiz de palomitas tiradas y mantequilla.<\/span><\/p>

Decides regresar tu atenci\u00f3n a la pel\u00edcula, pero a\u00fan no entiendes nada. Antes de lo que esperas, y sin ning\u00fan aviso, salen los cr\u00e9ditos, se prenden las luces y la gente empieza a levantarse. No entiendes a d\u00f3nde se fue el resto de la trama, ni por qu\u00e9 eres el \u00fanico que parece estar completamente inconforme con lo que acabas de ver. Te levantas, esquivas a los grupitos que salen a paso glacial de la sala, bajas las escaleras hacia la entrada y sales del cine. Te vas caminando por la calle.<\/span><\/p><\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t

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You go into the movie theater. You check the showtimes and get in line to buy your ticket. In front, two couples wait silently. You arrived at the right moment; the line behind you quickly gets longer, and now it turns out you\u2019re almost at the front. At the counter, you ask for one ticket for the movie you chose, you pay, and you head over to the concessions stand, where you purchase a medium bag of popcorn and a soda.<\/span><\/p>

You enter the theater and walk to the middle of the room. You stay in one of the seats next to the aisle. While you wait for the movie to start, you eat half the popcorn and try not to drink all the soda. You look around to see who else is there, and you find the couples that were in front of you in the line. One sits a couple of rows in front of you, while the other is all the way at the back, in the right corner of the room. You recognize no one else. The lights grow dimmer, and the sound of the first preview calls your attention to the screen.<\/span><\/p>

The movie starts. The credits roll, the title appears, and now you see the face of who you assume is the protagonist. You get comfortable in your seat, and cross one leg over the other. You take the last sip of your soda. The characters on the screen talk, walk about the house, eat. The doorbell rings, and one of them approaches the door to open it.<\/span><\/p>

First a man and then a woman come in. As soon as she enters the screen, she turns towards you and floats closer and closer, until she hovers a few meters from your head. Her brown eyes examine you, her lips are pursed for a second. She talks to you. With an eternal voice, she tells you things that are at first incomprehensible, that little by little gain meaning in your ears and your mind. As if replying, a small shiver runs down the length of your spine. She closes her eyes and breathes. She tells you secrets you did not know and details you missed, she reminds you of things you had forgotten.<\/span><\/p>

You, paralyzed, are incapable of saying anything. You try to open your mouth to speak, but you can\u2019t find it anywhere. She looks at you, her eyes conveying the smallest of smiles. You search in your mind for answers to the simplest questions she asks, but there is nothing. She calls you, and your entire body shivers, trying to respond. But you don\u2019t move, your mind does not compute, your lungs can\u2019t find their breath. She is silent, she waits serenely, but in her presence even the effort to reply becomes lost in your mind. She continues talking. You stare at her, dumbfounded.<\/span><\/p>

She tells you stories, your body vibrating with the energy her voice transmits. You get goosebumps and your ears turn red. She looks at you lovingly, and as she does you start finding small traces of ideas and memories in your head. Little by little, your mind becomes filled with lost recollections, with fleeting moments that convince you that you know her. You have been close for years, as she keeps you company during the day, watches over you at night. You remember her presence, you see her through half-closed eyes, just before falling asleep. You feel her, in the few dreams you can recall.<\/span><\/p>

She smiles at you. She shows you things that make you sad, happy, surprised. She sings you songs that you knew well, but that you now hear as though they were new, alive. She sings others that you have never heard, sounds and words that up to this moment had escaped the capabilities of your imagination. She recites poem after poem, each one more musical, deeper, than the last.<\/span><\/p>

And, as she fills your ears and head, you notice a warmth that you know you have felt, that was hidden inside of you, somewhere. It comes from the deepest point of your being, and it expands, first to your chest and towards your neck, through your arms and legs until it reaches the very tips of your fingers and toes. It wraps around you. And as it does, she looks at you steadily, understanding the moment, the light that you are now finding is the source of this warmth.<\/span><\/p>

But you stay in your seat, immobile, without ever having found that mouth you misplaced. You look at her with all the admiration you can conjure in your eyes. You examine her, attempting to preserve every detail of her face, her hands, her mouth and her eyes in your memory. And so, in your head, you catalogue and guard every trace of this interaction, assigning it a privileged place in the center of your conscience. In silence, you swear your eternal devotion, and, though she neither asks for nor wants it, your total obedience. You love her.<\/span><\/p>

Suddenly, a scream calls your attention back to the screen. Someone has died and a woman cries by their side. You don\u2019t know who either of the characters are, nor what is happening. Another character laughs, but you don\u2019t recognize him either, and as you search in your mind for some idea of what is going on in this movie, you find here and there traces of something important.<\/span><\/p>

You hold on to them, feeling as though they\u2019re indispensable, and you search deeper and deeper in your head for that moment that is escaping, that was here an instant ago and that quickly vanishes towards oblivion. From a voice and a secret that you have also forgotten, you attempt to reconstruct this that you know has just happened, that a moment ago was everything and that you now watch disappear.<\/span><\/p>

But the seat gives you an itch, your throat asks for more soda. And, as you raise the cup to check that, just as suspected, you have finished the drink and it is thirsty time, whatever remained of that moment vanishes, and you don\u2019t know what it is you\u2019re looking for so desperately in your memory. Now, instead, you hear the cellphone of the guy next to you vibrate, and the seat of the woman in front of you creak every time she moves. It bothers you to notice the floor is sticky under your shoes, and that the air that was so normal smelling is now polluted with the tinge of dropped popcorn and butter.<\/span><\/p>

You decide to return your attention to the movie, but you still do not understand a thing. Before long and unexpectedly, the credits roll, the lights go on and people start standing up. You wonder where the rest of the plot went off to, and why you are the only one who appears to be completely unhappy with what you just saw. You stand up, dodge the groups of people exiting the theater at a glacial pace, go down the stairs, and exit the cinema. You walk down the street, away from the movie theater.<\/span><\/p><\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Zine Volume 1: Mar\u00eda Published in February 2019, in Barcelona. Scroll down for a full transcription in Spanish and English. Previous Next Espa\u00f1ol Entras al cine, checas la cartelera y te formas para comprar un boleto. Adelante de ti, dos parejas esperan en silencio. Llegaste en el momento adecuado; la fila se hace m\u00e1s larga, […]<\/p>","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"parent":0,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/findelostiempos.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/711"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/findelostiempos.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/findelostiempos.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/page"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/findelostiempos.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/findelostiempos.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=711"}],"version-history":[{"count":13,"href":"https:\/\/findelostiempos.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/711\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":730,"href":"https:\/\/findelostiempos.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/711\/revisions\/730"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/findelostiempos.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=711"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}